God's Not Dead 4: God May Not Be Dead, But I Surely Am
by RidragonWasAMistake
Summary: oh lord I'm so sorry


Chapter 1: The Girl

Josh walked in to the sound of loud, blaring music. Attending concerts of his favorite band, the Newsboys, has always helped him take his mind off his life. The crowd was roaring, as every God-loving, innocent, and selfless Christian watched the Newsboys perform the only song anyone knew them for: God's Not Dead. Josh, however, was in deep tonight. He kept replaying that fateful moment in his head over and over, repeating his life-changing moment: the day he finally defeated Radisson. However, he was appalled to hear that he had died shortly thereafter. Even if he was the enemy of all he ever stood for, he didn't want him to die! Just as Josh reflected on the moment he lost his enemy, a seemingly modest girl walked up behind him and tapped him on his left shoulder. He nearly jumped to attention after being startled awake, but he turned around to lock eyes with this unknown woman. His innocent gaze was met with piercing green eyes that could make stones shiver and shake the soul of the strongest man.

"Are you Mr. Wheaton?" she asked, with a coy smile.

"Yes, I am. How may I be of service, Ms.?" replied Josh.

"I've something I'd like to ask you. Just a quick little question. Do you believe in reincarnation?"

Her question came as a surprise to the young man.

"N-no, it goes against my beliefs. Why do you ask?" Josh said, worried about the conversation's path.

"Ah, that's sad to hear. There's something I'd like to tell you, Mr. Wheaton," she said before being interrupted by a buzzing phone, "but it seems I'll have to get back to you. Meet me by the college at Seven PM sharp, please. You'd love to hear this." She said, before answering the blaring phone and walking away.

"W-wait! May I have your name?" he shouted. However, he did not shout loud enough to be heard over the band as they continued to play their one song over and over. He watched as the mysterious girl disappeared into the crowd.

Chapter 2: The Meeting

Josh woke up, dazed from last night. He had stayed up late at the concert, listening to the Newsboys song God's Not Dead repeatedly. He planned to go again the next time it was convenient for the plot. He got out of bed and wet throughout his morning routine, his mind fixated on the events of the preceding night. Just who was this woman who decided to approach him, and why did she ask him about reincarnation? He had dwelled on it for a while. However, he had college to worry about as well. He ate a quick bowl of his favorite cereal, brushed his teeth, groomed his hair, and read a passage from the Bible. He decides to read a passage from Lamentations today, as he had felt particularly glum ever since Radisson died. He had wanted to talk with him more, see if he could convert him. However, he was unable to reach him before his untimely demise. He went throughout the day as normal from there on out, paying special interest in his psychology class. His teacher, Mr. Rupertsheckel, was a disinteresting man who could barely hold his attention. Radisson challenged him, at the very least. At the end of his school period, he felt his phone ring in his pocket. He checked to see what it was, and saw the reminder he had set: "Meeting with Woman 7 PM". He decided to stay for a while at the college, waiting for his mysterious appointment. Eventually, she arrived, dressed slightly formally in a semi-casual ensemble.

"So, I'd like to continue our talk yesterday." Josh shouted to his enigmatic partner.

"I'd love to. So, according to you, you don't believe in reincarnation because it goes against your faith. I'm correct in this regard, right?" she asked.

"Yes. I believe that after life, a person goes to God to either stay with him in heaven or be sent to hell to pay for their sins." His response was more concise than what he would usually give to a question like that.

"Alright, I have a scenario for you. What if God had sent a person back to live a new life in a new body?" Her question struck Josh as odd. Why would she propose such an odd scenario? "I am a practicing Christian as well as you, for your information."

"That's wonderful to hear! And in that scenario, I guess it'd be God's will. So, I guess I get your angle here. But why do you ask this?"

"Ah, I guess I had forgotten to introduce myself. My name is Jeffery Radisson."

"What." It was all Josh could muster in this moment of brain-blasting realization. He was absolutely floored, his mind reeled from a few simple words!

"I guess Jeffery isn't a good name for me anymore. So, Jessica Radisson now. I've gotten a second chance, I guess you could say."

"But... I... What? I don't... What should I... Uh..." Josh's vocabulary had fled him at an astonishing rate. The well-spoken gentleman was reduced to a stuttering madman at the revelation that his presumedly dead teacher cheated the grave by divine favour.

"Anyways, I'd like to thank you. Without your words, I probably wouldn't have had this second chance. So, I'd like to take you out to dinner. Is that fine with you?"

"Uh, sure, yes. When? Where?"

"How does Outback sound, and this Thursday?"

"That sounds good, I'll set a reminder, see you then!" Josh stumbled away, desperately trying to figure out what on earth was going on. Radisson watched her rescued walk away, and a slight laugh came from her lips. She would enjoy going to dine with him soon.

Chapter 3: The Dinner

2 days turns out to not be a long time to wait when you have other things on your mind. Josh was still in college, after all. As Thursday quickly approached, he mentally steeled himself for his quote-on-quote "date" with Radisson. Josh, being the good God-fearing Christian that basically defined his life, was not gay, but he did always believe that Radisson had a surprisingly good-looking body for a roughly 30 year old man. He looked youthful and full of vigor, and Joshua enjoyed his debates with him. But now, Radisson was a shockingly beautiful woman. A light brown halo of hair encompasses the head and shoulders, and striking green eyes drew a person in. Josh realized that there was no actual time set in stone, so he spent his day after school hanging out in front of the local Outback. Eventually, Radisson showed up. She wore a formal dress that, while modest, still was able to show an average frame.

"Well, shall you escort your lady?" Radisson teasingly asked, walking up to Josh.

"Uh, sure. Let's head in."

They were seated quickly, as it was fairly empty due to being a Thursday night. Josh ordered a Grilled Chicken, and Radisson got a Caesar Salad. As they waited for their food to arrive, Radisson eyes over her date. Josh was a fairly tall and good looking man. He had a fairly muscular frame, but not one that made a person think that he worked out much. He wore his brown hair short usually, and today was no exception. Overall, he wasn't bad looking, just a bit rough. Their food arrived, and they began to eat.

"So... why did you want to eat with me again, Ms. Radisson?" Joshua asked.

"Just Jessica is fine. Or even Jess. And I feel as if I owe you. Without your words, I would've never turned towards God." Radisson didn't say, but she was also interested in him in particular.

"Ah, ok. That's good to hear. So, is there anything you'd like to talk about, Jessica?"

"Sure, I have a few questions for you. Firstly... do you have a girlfriend?"

The question shocked Josh a little. "Uh, no. Not any more. I had one for a few years, but she and I broke up when I decided to go through with the debate."

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to break you guys up, even inadvertently." Radisson inwardly grinned. She would get more chances with the target of her obsession, it seemed.

"Well, it isn't your fault. If our relationship ended over one argument, I guess it went very strong in the first place. And she also was never a Christian and was generally a terrible person. I'm glad she was burned at the stake by our pastor for not being a Christian."

"Ah, so it all worked out for God's will in the end, huh?"

"Yeah, I guess so. Anyways, it seems that we're both done. Before I get going, here's my phone number so we can text more often. I'll talk to you later." Josh got up to leave free paying for the food, but Radisson quickly turned him around to give him a kiss on the cheek. He stood dazed as she walked away, a skip in her step.

Chapter 4: The Part Where The Author Conveniently Skips Characterizing The Relationship

Josh had spent a lot of time texting and talking to Radisson afterwards. Firstly, it was to figure out why she suddenly pressed her face against his, but a genuine love began to blossom between the two. Initially, Radisson said it was to tease Josh, but over time, came to admit to herself that she was infatuated with him. Eventually, Josh mustered up the courage to ask her out. Gleefully, she accepted and they decided to eat at insert restaurant here. Once they had arrived, they immediately noticed a sharp drop in the quality of writing and the Chinese guy from GnD 2 with the Muslim chick from GnD 1. They had caught up on old times with Mrs. Muslim and found out that they were a couple now.

Neat.

Eventually they ordered their foods. Josh had a heaping plate of Lasagna, and Radisson has cat meat. Raw. They decided to talk about their relationship and where it's going. It was fairly obvious that they were immensely interested in each other, and they wanted to act on it. So, Josh did what any sane person would do. He proposed with a plastic vending machine ring. Because I'm completely destroying lore, Radisson agreed, and they did the kissing. And then they headed back home.

However

it just crossed Josh's mind again

he was technically dating a nearly 30~40 year old.

it didn't really bother him though; this is fanfiction.

Chapter 5: Loose Ends

20 years has passed. Radisson and Josh are happily married with 2 children because they are the perfect nuclear family. Eventually, Child B asked mommy and daddy how they met, and they told them the whole story.

it fucked him up good


End file.
